Let’s Be Happy 3

What’s a happiness spoiler for you? I’d like to invite you to delve into this topic a bit deeper with the story below.

HAPPY FOURTH

An exchange student who fought to keep his country from turning into a communist regime asked a professor, “Do you know how to catch wild pigs?” Then he explained:

You catch wild pigs by finding a suitable place in the woods and putting corn on the ground. The pigs find it and begin to come every day to eat the free corn. When they are used to coming every day, you put a fence down one side of the place where they are used to coming. When they get used to the fence, they begin to eat the corn again and you put up another side of the fence. They get used to that and start to eat again. You continue until you have all four sides of the fence up with a gate in the last side.The pigs, which are used to the free corn, start to come through the gate to eat that free corn again. Then you slam the gate on them and catch the whole herd. Suddenly the wild pigs have lost their freedom. They run around and around inside the fence, but to no avail. Soon they go back to eating the free corn. They are so used to it that they have forgotten how to forage in the woods for themselves, so they accept their captivity. The young man told the professor that is exactly what he sees happening in America.

What’s wrong with enjoying the food for we all eventually die. But what a way to live and die. Is this what you want? Is there no way out? Apparently, happiness needs an environment of freedom. No wonder, our brave freedom fighters go to war if there is no other way. But there are other arenas, some more personal, where we fight to guard the freedom we already have.

To stay on course, let’s keep in mind a few things. There is no such thing as a free lunch, and evil exists along side the good. What is free is not really, what is beneficial may not be, cause they lead you to captivity. In the end, good intention is not enough. There are nice people but who take advantage of others instead of “loving your neighbor as yourself” and justify lying with good intentions like promising protection and free stuff from cradle to the grave. It is when we are down and out that we may be tempted to take the easier way out. And now that we are hit with one of the worst inflation, the more we have to watch who we trust. Can’t simply follow the crowd or that free stuff. It might be a timely reminder to say that Hitler used inflation as the single issue that brought him to absolute power. Will history repeat itself? Yes, if we forget lessons from the past, and allow fear of survival to lull us in to destructive values. Maybe that is why Jesus said, be gentle as a dove but wise as a serpent. It is not enough to be nice, we must be wise. And there are those who refuse to compromise to get ahead.

Einstein once said, “Genius is 1% talent, and 99% hard work.”

May we not become a society addicted to freebees? Freebees is addictive. “The instant gratification from dopamine it produces is a rewarding feeling like that produced by drugs. But dopamine also prevent us from learning that the reward is fleeting. It creates a learning resistance at the primal level of the brain as happens in gambling or social media by interfering with reward prediction. It overrides our self-awareness or reflection that a thing is damaging, deceptive or degrading, with an illusion that the reward is ever new and worth pursuing.

Indeed, nothing is free including happiness. This reminds me of the brothers Jacob and Esau. For a bowl of porridge, elder brother Esau sold his birthright to younger brother Jacob. Many have given up their lives for the freedom we enjoy today. Unfortunately, many are going to make choices out of fear or for instant gratification due to wrong belief, misplaced trust, naive expectation which plunged them into greater losses, moral failures, and spoiled happiness. But it’s not too late to get back if we “seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness. Then all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33. After all, we do not live by bread alone.

Small Step: So when the world is unkind, do I turn into swine and forget I am made in God’s image? To remember freedom day, what is one thing I can do to celebrate?

What If It’s My Truth

Now-a-days, truth has a new rival. It‘s called “my truth.” Is that a problem? Well, what we once refer to as my point of view, my experience, my story or my take is now hollowed, elevated from the subjective to the absolute, from the personal to the sacred, such that mere countering “my truth” becomes a serious personal affront. It is bolted by another asinine myth called entitlement. It means rights without responsibility. Granted, one’s needs and perceived unjust treatments should be heard, but can one justly demand it be accepted at face value? Since when is one’s claim a proof in itself, and since when is any truth protected from scrutiny?

Am I the only one bothered by this? Isn’t it common knowledge that we are all susceptible to biases? You might have heard of confirmation bias, self-serving bias, culture bias or in-grown bias, to name a few. Can a 21st century person end up biased? Sure he can.

The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, it’s that they know so many things that just aren’t so – Mark Twain

To find fulfillment and answer, don’t we tend to take the easy way out by changing reality to favor us, instead of confronting our problems and inadequacies with rigorous research and sound reasoning? Instead of due process, we use undue speed. I am amazed at how even highly educated people put comfort before conscience, degree before dignity, progress before principle, empathy before evidence, profit before people, votes before victims, compliance before science. In so doing, we end up confusing my truth with the truth, prevention with purging, fact with feeling, compassion with compromise, authenticity with mere sincerity, examination with experimentation, reality with ideology.

A society that denies objective truth finds itself standing on shifting ground. Often, the children suffer the most.

Truth takes time. Early in life I tried to find the truth of the matter since I didn’t like being fooled. Having clear rules helps. Meaning what you say to me is another. Later on, I learned that clarity, objectivity, rationality and consistency were characteristics of truth. These are things money can’t buy yet truth is essential to life. But there’s more.

Truth is universal. It does not change with time, person or place. Truth is falsifiable (testable) for accuracy and consistency so that is does not avoid cross examination. I am less inclined to believe if I am not allowed to question it. Wouldn’t you?

Moreover, it is comprehensive. It has the full in view, weeding out partiality and omission. That means you get the head and tail, not just bits and pieces when you form your judgment. It is the only way to weed out biases, like the lion on the right.

If our ideas do not match with reality, isn’t that a definition of insanity? Indeed, some have become insane from being “educated” believing that re-framing changes reality for everybody. Take the example of a rose. May I call it red? A rose will still be a rose by any other name, because a rose is not a social nor personal construct, but a real object. One grave result of fudging with reality is we end up losing ourselves. Sad to say, mental illness is on the rise especially among the youth.

Truth does not change.

We were not here before we were born. We won’t be here after we die. So how can we be the source of truth? Shouldn’t we take a reasonably humble and cautious attitude to seek understanding instead of cancelling everyone that disagrees with us? Like a real scientist.

Don’t Give up...because Truth wins eventually

Caution: a seeker of truth becomes an outlier. You are not afraid to challenge, debate, and change when proven wrong. Truth is not of human nature. To be on truth’s side, you must be wiling to hate lying to others and to yourself. Jesus was crucified because He spoke the truth. Living out the truth is not for the fainthearted.

Quick Check: Am I aware of my own biases? How open am i to challenging “my truth”?

2022, what’s new?

Good day and welcome to Flight 2022. We are prepared to take off into the New Year. Please make sure your Positive Attitude and Gratitude are secured and locked in the upright position. All self-destruct devices; pity, anger, selfishness and resentment should be turned off at this time. All negativity, hurt and discouragement should be put away. Should you lose you positive Attitude under pressure during this flight, reach up and pull down a prayer. Prayers will automatically be activated by Faith. Once your Faith is activated, you can assist other passengers who are of little faith. There will BE No BAGGAGE allowed on this flight. God, our Captain has cleared us for take-off. Destination – GREATNESS! Wishing you a New Year filled with new HOPE, new JO and new BEGINNINGS! Stay Blessed and welcome in 2022. Hope you had a nice Christmas. Ist day of January. Very sunny in SD. (author anonymous)

Maybe you are done with new year’s resolution. And please, not another new variant of the virus.

I know. How’s about this, just a refreshing  take off?

One new attitude puts you in the new year. 

“Not that i have attained it, but one thing I do: forgetting things behind and reaching out for what’s ahead for me in Christ Jesus.” St. Paul

Happy Holiday? Hmm…

I like to call it by its proper name, Christmas. Proper name shows respect and recognition. It’s Independence Day, not just holiday. Or Mary, not just woman. It is heartwarming to receive a Christmas wish the way it has inspired countless musicians to write soul rousing songs. “O Holy Night” “Mary Did You Know” “Joy to the World” are so so good. That does not happen with “Holiday” no matter how many “Happy” we put in front of it.

This Christmas, I decorated before Thanksgiving, to have more time to enjoy its message. I guess this is the real reason why. Christmas is huge so that a day or a week to enjoy and talk about it is not enough. Whereas we so much need to be lifted up in spirit. Have you heard of the little known story of the Magi which says they did not see the baby Jesus until January 6? I’d say why not prolong the celebration of hope till then? Surely a pandemic year would not reject the idea of spreading more hope and good cheer. Shall we then say it like it is?

Be filled with the joy and peace of Christmas throughout the year.

What’s it called?

What is it called?

 Everyone starts life by  getting acquainted with one's body and surrounding. When Adam started life,  God brought to him the living creatures to see what he would call them.  The Bible said that "whatever name Adam gave for each, that became its name."  So the first time Adam met Eve he said "she is bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh." He gave his wife two names. "Eve" or "Chava" in Hebrew because she was the mother of all the living; and  "Isha" which means woman, the feminine form of Hebrew  "ish" for man. Her gender is part of her identity not just an add on. Her names described her role, her term of engagement, her relationship with Adam. In other words, naming is basic for living and much more.

Don’t you think that account is amazing? I do. It is God naming the world as He sees it, which is a good definition of truth. It means names are not to be tampered with, but respected because Reality exists. It means that reality exists apart from our own understanding, certified by God Himself.

These days, who hasn’t come across a misnomer?  Violence is called peaceful? Colorblindness is racist? Abortion is life-saving? Criminals are victims. Parents who stand up for their children’s education are domestic terrorists? The nameless mass is hailed as heroes and anyone with a notable name is in danger of being replaced, twisted or obliterated. It is like people take the liberty to define reality including history, value, morality, identity and rules of engagement, to the extent that names no longer need to correlate with reality. The assumption is Truth no longer exists, only one’s own perception or feelings is true.

What happens when you are Jane today and Jill tomorrow by the time you reach Russia? If Pam is the convicted felon, what happens if she is now Pete?

Misnomers create a fractured world instead of a universe where people can converse intelligently (uni: one; verse: word). Now, that is much worse than communication gap which is usually just misunderstanding. Rather, it is idiocy fueled by misinformation, ideology and controlled narratives. That’s one sophisticated description of lying infiltrating pre-schools all the way to the top universities. If reality is fluid, how does one decide what is? How can one be ever sure? How does that train anyone to think clearly, communicate accurately, or execute precisely? Then only a life of failure and misery awaits them. Isn’t it a mark of childishness to be double-minded, to disregard consequences, to believe with passion that which is not tested against broad wisdom in existence for centuries? And I thought testing is the basis of scientific research?

From experience we know mistrust turns people against each other, not just distancing them. Instead of changing the world, we are changed by the world we created. We become skeptical, cynical and alienated where we no longer know who to believe, what number to check, what name to use. After a while, we create causes to justify those lies, make up categories, events, victims and enemies that don’t exist as long as these yield the desired result we want. That is how victim-hood becomes hip. It’s lucrative.

For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord, since he is a double-minded individual , unstable in all his ways. James 1:7-8

Ah… did you hear that a teacher was fired for misusing pronouns! What? Can’t he just correct himself? Obviously the issue is not grammar. Rather, designation, speaking and human transactions are now based on color, gender, politics, ideology, feelings or mere loudness. Grammatical rules, language rules, moral rules are now a thing of the past? Well, if someone wants to change the basic rules of engagement, shouldn’t one have the right to challenge them or opt out, without getting vilified or fired? Creating rules that are one-sided only court friction. Worse if it is turned into a policy or a law. It’s a lie that it is done for unity, equity or progress. To call it justice is another misnomer.

Control the words to control someone’s reality and change it to one’s advantage. That’s gaslighting. I know what peaceful protest is when I see one. I bet you do too since you’d run for cover otherwise. You would not find it amusing if someone makes you second guess what you know is true and then suggests that you are paranoid or crazy. Would you?

Better ask how can one know he has fallen into any of these holes. Only the wise is willing to face his lie and admit it. For our greatest enemy is ourselves. We lie to ourselves constantly to get what we want. But since life for Adam did not start with a lie, neither should we. Be bold and call it by its name.

Small step: Have you come up with a way to sort out truth from distortion? May I suggest checking the basics or the Bible for how God calls “it” for real?

Going forward

In times of trouble or uncertainty, we naturally look for safety and help. However, a crisis also brings out the best or the worst in us. And boy it did! Who would imagine we could be so shaken, so unprepared, so needy, so gullible, and so unhinged? Where do we turn to for help?

“People who need people…are the luckiest people in the world.” Streisand was fabulous in that song. But it rings hollow, especially now. For we have been found wounded and wanting, preyed upon by people preoccupied with personal gains. We are silenced and isolated from loved ones while technocrats feast, write books and tyrants give orders. We get propaganda instead of news. We are told it is peaceful while stores are pillaged. Some are left to die alone while others fight for toilet paper! We either die or are used. The small world becomes awfully smaller in my eyes. I feel sadness, who wouldn’t?

We do not need nice people to tell us what we want to hear, but one who can to tell us like it is. Even God rejects blind faith less the blind leads the blind. This is when the belief of an all knowing, all seeing God makes more sense. He will never say, “I didn’t see it coming.”

Like a chorus the whole world perceives a sudden threat from an invisible virus but not the visibly vile changes leading to it and what follows thereafter. We hear something but see something else. We are to wear mask, but blindfolded too? There’s inclusion that excludes, unity that separates, freedom that cancels, social justice that sides, science doctored, equality that classifies, numbers that don’t add up, parents that sell children, children that stab parents, neighbors that tell, aborted live babies twice killed. So I wonder, which is more dangerous, virus or vile people?

In crisis time, is it wiser to examine and self-reflect, or to rush and foment it into a struggle? Does a fisherman expect to find fish in turbulent waters? Surely more disturbances breed angry and mean people; stokes fear and mental illness. Quite the opposite of the benevolence, prudence, peace and strength we hope for. When elephants fight, the ants are trampled. What happened to the educated, enlightened humanity? Aren’t we told we are evolving? What happened to empathy?

If we are still thinking that the end justifies the means, that the heart of the matter is beyond the heart and not the heart itself, we do not reap what we sow in the heart and we can invent our own reality without changing the heart, then we have not seen enough. Let’s open our eyes.

Ironically, it takes an invisible virus to remind us of the obvious, that evil exists though hidden, human reactions to crisis show it; while death attends us all, it creeps up to us in unexpected ways. And the work we do is never enough to prepare us for it. We can only see so much of what is ahead and extend so much of what we have. Our hard earned sense of independence and self-sufficiency quickly blow up in our faces. Moreover, when the desire to thrive means to compete, cheat, take, kill or be taken and killed, then humans have spoken through Cain: am I my brother’s keeper? Humanism and materialism may remove God and spiritual priorities, but they end up turning people against one another. Probably the weakest part of these underpinnings of our society is the mistaken notion of who we really are, the man reflected in the mirror. Without truth, the combination of power and desire blinds. It is very destructive. Unless God intervenes, no one will make it, including Cain. But God did.

Who is God? To use the law of entropy in physics, the material world is diminishing. Unless a greater outside delivering (GOD) force is applied, such as care and protection, entropy continues to its end. But the help cannot be just any outside force. It has to be one needing no outside help but is self-sufficient without limits. Only God can do so. You might say that is too wonderful it can’t be true. But that is why He is called God and not human nor monster.

He does not even need to kill to self-protect like humans do. Instead, He sacrificed Himself that others may live. So this God is not just powerful and all sufficient, but personal for He understands and loves. Unlike humans who design laws but can’t even see the tip of their noses, let alone human hearts, the all seeing God creates law and order that rules the heart. No wonder when cannibalistic tribes adopt this God as King and His law as theirs, they stop eating people. The weakest members in those societies need not die. Instead of entropy, they thrive. Going forward, instead of ending, there is eternity.

“Happy is the people whose God is the Lord.” Psalm 144:15

Quick check: Going forward, which way for you? A lot depends on what you can see, where you look. Is it time to reconsider where you seek help?

Let’s be happy part 2

Did you say “happily ever after”? You probably know better just by the rate of divorce worldwide. Don’t get me wrong. There’s no problem with dreaming of lasting happiness. The thing is, happiness is an emotional state that fluctuates, not a static destination. Worse, many do not realize it fluctuates according to the moral state of our heart.

Surprised to hear that? Notice that when you help someone you feel light, you can fly. It is like saying the flip side of happiness is holiness, whereas sin weighs us down.

There was a merchant who asked his best friend to build him a house. But the best friend used subpar materials to build. When the house was done, the merchant gave it to this best friend as a surprise present. Pretending to be happy, he thanked the merchant profusely. But inside, he was drowning in shame and regret. “I am a big fool!”

As the good Book said, “The wise man builds his house upon the rock, the foolish man builds it on the sand.” It is like building a make-believe world. So, to build a life of happiness, wisdom should inform and tame our emotions and lace our decisions and actions. If life is a house, I will wisely build it on moral foundation. Would you then agree if I say the ubiquitous thief of happiness is foolishness, and not failure, friends, or fate?

The fool speaks before listening, acts before thinking. He says, no one will find out. It is okay, everybody is doing it. He said, “there’s a lion in the street,” but he does not check it. He might be sleek and eloquent, but only seeks his own opinion. The stomach is his god. My rights and interests equal justice. Oh, and my needs and sufferings make me above reproach. He believes the end justifies the means even if he robs others or sells his conscience. He enjoys the company of fools for after all, the fool is morally blind.

Are you now ready to work your heart? Start by asking, then listen and think it through to gain wisdom. Why are you here and what/who is it you are living for? What is the foundation you are building on? Take it from there. Do not fake your answers.

How then do we pursue happiness? Not without a moral-makeover for sure. It is more like crafting a jewel– carefully. We can learn from God who did not just throw away Adam and Eve to start all over again. Why? Happiness is not about changing our past or circumstances, but about crafting good hearts in the present which will ultimately change the way ahead to one’s benefit. It is a labor of love much like how going thru the wilderness for 40 years, God prepared the people leaving 400 years of slavery in Egypt behind to the promised land. Are there things weighing you down from the past? Are you a work in progress? In due time you will be rewarded. Don’t give up.

Things that no eye has seen, or ear heard, or mind imagined, are the things God has prepared for those who love him. I Cor2:9

Want More questions for a happy heart? Here you go: Ask yourself– what fills your heart? Which ones would Jesus want you to let go? Are you living by and in your emotions? What do you fear most? Do you have the fear of God? When was the last time you set some moral foundations? On what basis do you choose your friends? Are you controlled by something immoral? Are you aware that you are building a house you will live in forever? Are you easily offended and act on it just as easily? Do you eat your pain away? What is eating you? Instead of feeding your emotion, what do you feed your body and soul?

Let’s be happy

Do you want to be happy? Of course, we all do. Happiness is so good even our Declaration of Independence says we have the right to pursuit it. We know it is not referring to just feeling good. It is more like having a blessed life where you feel cheerful contentment, attaining, and high-spirited, but also enjoying simple pleasures. Overall, it is more long lasting when it is not dependent on the surrounding circumstances, but emanating from within your heart.

But sadly, people often behave differently in its pursuit. Maybe they would forget, compromise, or even sacrifice people and principles that stand in their way. Is that necessary? How does one find happiness?

First of all, is happiness promised to all? Just like many other good things, it isn’t. If not, why do we act like it is then conclude that life is unfair? This misconception easily breeds resentment. Still others develop a crab mentality saying: Why me? If I am not happy, neither can you. If I suffer, so should you. Until I am happy, dare you. As expected, this mindset is behind counterproductive harmful behaviors that create more unhappiness.

I also wish everyone can be happy. But you and I have lived long enough to know that happiness would not just appear on our plate. Should happiness come to us or should we create it? I am greeted every morning with a ray of sunshine but the rest is mostly up to me. Creating happiness is not just possible, it is a must.

In the Bible, we are told it is a personal choice and responsibility, not somebody else’s. In that case, rather than waiting or relying on others, picking the right meaning of happiness, the right goal and method makes a difference whether we create it or not. It is aiming for peace and fulfillment without involving foul play. It is about who and what we are and become, and what we do with our lives.

To put it in a nutshell: Loving and being loved, united in harmony and security, no longer conflicted nor separated, especially from God, you experience wholeness is such peace. Growing up, realizing a dream, delivering a duty or promise, building strength, dignity and justice, overcoming obstacles and weaknesses is such fulfillment.

Yes, we would meet failures. But is failure really incompatible with happiness or a part of it? We might think the happy story of Adam and Eve ended miserably. It didn’t because they had redemption, instead of punishment only. Receiving a blessing we don’t deserve is “grace.” The same grace offered them transformation. Thus they experienced another kind of happiness after overcoming their failure. It was no longer an idyllic happiness, but the joy of overcoming, of learning, of growth. It’s also more personal. Such becomes the conquests we celebrate, the love songs we sing, and the unforgettable stories we leave behind.

What would happen if my life is not yet what I expect it to be? But does it have to always be the best for us to be happy? If that is the case, the best has become the enemy of good, preventing us from enjoying the good, the present blessings. It is so sad to forfeit so much of what could be better because we only want the best to feel happy. And if happiness relies on one big shot of a lifetime, we would be paralyzed at the thought of missing out.

Does it have to always be the best for us to be happy?

Truth is happiness is made of many “grace moments” as we hit and miss. Isn’t it smart that failures can be useful like firewood on the stove? By grace we can create different kinds of happiness out of trouble, and that without turning ourselves into demons first. Grace trickles down like dew that nourish the land, rejuvenating it. And like the tide that goes in and out shaping the landscape, at times if we just give it some time, we regain from our losses, reach our goals and become happier.

And when you finally noticed your “grace moment”, savor it like wine, sniff it like fresh bread, with gratefulness. A grateful heart quickly turns it into happiness, whereas grumpiness and malcontent spoil it. Jesus said those who are faithful in little will receive even more. That way, you CREATE more happiness, much much more.

Quick start: What’s that towel in your hand? To wipe dirt, clean your face, or wrap around your body? Are you grateful or did you just miss “happiness”? When was the last time you chose to be “unhappy”? To be “happy”? Do you have a quick start to share? Welcome to send it in.