Do you check the mirror before stepping out? Dress for success. Walk head up even though you are broken?
We all want to be respected, to be seen, to be heard, to be known. It is a basic human need. Children grow up maladjusted when they lack enough good attention. It is a desire so strong that they often say, “Look at me.” Maybe you did that too as a child. What did you do to be noticed then? Adults are not spared the dis-ease. We might even act out, fake illness, play the martyr, crack a tired joke, just to get attention, any attention.
Sadly, we don’t always get the proper attention we seek. It could be too little, too late, or too much. (We could be pestered by unwanted demands and attention that we neglect our real needs.) When this need is unmet, some might fall prey to groomers, predators and bullies who take advantage of them. Not everyone knows how to give or get attention. But the need remains.
Sometime in my teen years, I realized it’s a dog eat dog world. I learned that paying attention to oneself is more practical and effective than craving attention from others. To be able to “look at me” with my own eyes, not somebody else’s, is more helpful.
Being able to take an objective look at oneself is a milestone to growing up. Who am I, how do I act when there is no one around to observe or impress, but me? Then it turns out this is actually a good thing. Self-awareness happens when we evaluate our motives, goals, ability, and make adjustments where needed. Not only that, Science tells us that how we perceive ourselves is projected onto others. It’s involved in pygmallon effect. Self-awareness gives us more control over how we want others to perceive us and behave around us, more than just the knowledge of how others think of us. Then we get the attention that is healthy and proper.
Lastly, once we understand how God sees us, we would want to prioritize it over the others. Because thru it, we get uninterrupted and undiluted attention so that we experience inner peace, almost fearless, even when ignored, maligned or rejected. And because He could see thru us and beyond. What we will be 28 years later! He said to Peter, you will be the rock. How to get to this condition? Simply learn to align ourselves with His values and purpose. It is like a button is pressed when a person aligns himself with Him. Make sense for how do you fill your cup unless you align it to the spout?
Small Step: Have you felt you’ve been less appreciated lately, working too hard to find approval? Try to align one of your purpose with God’s.